Ralston Sinclair

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Ralston Sinclair is a journalist for the daily periodical The Caprican. Sinclair lives on Caprica.[1]

Journalist credits for The Caprican


Financial ties to the STO?

What Is Daniel Graystone Hiding? is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in Martius 6, YR42.


Yeah, you might all be singing the tune of a New Colony Order, proclaiming Daniel Graystone as your new savior. The man who will save our kids from the moral apocalypse by throwing Holoband profits into a charity that will encourage youngsters to develop "real values," whatever that means, on all counts.

I'm telling you, I don't buy it. Not one bit.

Hey, if Graystone wants to throw away all the profits he makes from the Holoband and V-World licensing, that's swell. Holobands only account for about, oh, 60% of Graystone Industries' profit revenue. Who needs it, really? Graystone may be something of a changed man - perhaps with certain new outlooks on life - after the death of his daughter and the discovery that she was involved with the MAGLEV tragedy. But he's not going to throw away more than half his meal ticket just because his kid played too many video games. He's a Businessman, first and foremost. You don't get to be Caprica's greatest rags-to-riches story by being anything else.

The whole thing stinks to high heaven.

Hey, the Global Defense raided the Graystone household last week, did you know that? What were they looking for? Evidence that Zoe Graystone was involved with the bombing? What other evidence do you need other than her mom going on television and announcing to the Twelve Colonies that Her Daughter Was A Terrorist? Or is there more to the story? Are there complications and convolutions? Was Zoe Graystone into more than just monotheistic extremists? Or, was Zoe not the only Graystone up to no good?

OK, I'll just come out and say it: Does Daniel Graystone have financial ties to the STO?

And, if not, what sort of brand new Product, some brilliant new Invention, does he have in the pipeline that will fill the void of sixty godsdamn per cent of his profit revenue?

If any of you run into Daniel Graystone on the street, see if you can take a gander up his sleeve. Something's there. And it stinks.

External link[edit]

Preceded by:
'Graystone Foundation' Established
What Is Daniel Graystone Hiding? Succeeded by:
Citizens Use Marshmallows to Protest Caprica Government
Move on!

The MAGLEV Memorial: It's Time to Move On is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in Martius 14, YR42.


People, I understand that it's important to remember our loved ones who died in the senseless tragedy that was the MAGLEV bombing. I understand that we often like to honor them with trinkets and flowers and all that. But what started out as a rather moving tribute has now become an eyesore. In other words, it's time to get all that crap off the sidewalk.

The sight of all the dead flowers, crumpled cards and random items of memorabilia is bad enough, but what's worse is what they represent: Our inability to let go and move on, at least outside the privacy of our own homes.

How long are we going to let the STO or whoever blew up that train gloat and smirk over our collective grief? You know we empower these frakkin' jerkoffs by turning the area into a gift shop that looks like it vomited all over itself. We show them that we're certainly not healing because we're too busy remembering.

Pray for your loved ones. Damn straight, every day. Hold them in your hearts. But let's clean up the sidewalk and show these terrorists that Caprica will press on no matter what kind of horrible crap gets thrown at us.

External link[edit]

Preceded by:
Teen Fun Excitement! Get Your Butts to the Dance!
The MAGLEV Memorial: It's Time to Move On Succeeded by:
Delphi Institute Loses Major Funding
Only two?

Two (Out of Seven) MAGLEV Stations Re-open is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in Maius 3, YR42.


Hey, yeah, it's something, but it's still a disgrace.

I'd like to send out a half-assed "Congratulations" to the Caprican Department of Public Works, the Department of Community Relations, the Department of Roads and Bridges, the Department of Transportation and the dozens of other departments that I'm sure are involved with this continuing fiasco for actually managing to open not one but two MAGLEV stations that were, shall we say, "affected" by the STO bombing a few months ago.

Wow, guys. Two whole stations! Out of seven! Yeah, the street and sidewalk below is still a frakkin' mess, but at least people can actually get to that mess - or a part of it, anyway - via MAGLEV train now. After about what seems like a hundred months after the incident. Yeah!

For the love of the gods, I'm talking about accountability here, people. I'm talking about Caprican pride. The longer the MAGLEV line and the streets below lie in ruins, the more powerful a message of complacency and apathy we're giving to the other Colonies. Yeah, come one, come all, come and blow us up, we don't care! Eventually, oh, corrosion or something will clean up the mess.

I don't care where the "funding" comes from, pass around a frakkin' hat. But get the money, and get it fixed, and get it cleaned up. Now. Or else the rest of the Colonies will shake their heads and sigh and wonder why we're asleep all the godsdamn time.

External link[edit]

Preceded by:
Caprica Prepares for Upcoming Census
Two (Out of Seven) MAGLEV Stations Re-open Succeeded by:
The Caprican Will Return!
"Oh, the poor man."

O Daniel, Where Art Thou? is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in October 29, YR42.


Yeah, if I just lost my daughter, my wife, my company, every godsdamn thing I've ever worked for and cared about was suddenly frakkin' gone, I'd disappear for a while, too.

Except this is Daniel Graystone we're talking about. And Daniel Graystone has never thrown in the towel on anything in his life.

Let everyone else say, "Oh, the poor man." Yes. Suddenly, he's no longer the man that spawned a teenage terrorist. Now that his mentally unstable terror mom wife took a swan dive off a bridge and his company has been swallowed up by his number-one rival, any and all "sins" of the past have been forgiven.

"Oh, the poor man."

I say nuts. I say what a frakkin' load of crap. I say... just what is he planning, hmm? What is he scheming, up there in his lonely castle?

The poor, sad, lonely man.

The rich, sad, lonely man, people.

The rich genius, with every possible resource at his fingertips to make his every desire and whim come true. You think he's up there just, what, grieving? No. This is Daniel Graystone. He can pay someone else to do the majority of his grieving so all he has to do is grieve just a little. And therefore spend the rest of his time doing....


That's the question.

But it's something, dear readers. He's not just crying himself to sleep. He's not just going through a couple of bottles of whatever poison a day, not taking showers, not shaving, all that stuff.

No. Daniel Graystone has a plan. This guy loses his daughter, his wife, his company, his frakkin' Pyramid team... you think he's going to just let that lie? With all his pride, with all his wealth, with all his stinkin' genius?

The man has a plan. Count on it. What is it? I don't know. But I have a feeling we'll find out soon enough.

External link[edit]

Preceded by:
The Caprican Will Return!
O Daniel, Where Art Thou? Succeeded by:
Where Will the STO Strike Next?
Why the roadblock?

Just Wondering About That Military Roadblock Thing is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in November 16, YR42.


Why was there a military roadblock in the first place when a Graystone Industries truck collided with it?

Am I the only person who wants to know the answer to that question? Or even thought to ask it?

Yeah, a Graystone Industries truck blew up to hell and gone recently when it collided with a military roadblock. I'm sure it was a hell of a thing, straight out of a TV show - a runaway truck goes full speed into glorious destruction, exploding into a thousand frakkin' fireballs when it collided with a bunch of tanks.

But why was there a MILITARY roadblock? What the hell was in that truck that made a bunch of frakkin' soldiers scurry about in the middle of the night with tanks and bazookas and stop it from ever reaching wherever the hell it was going?

We're never going to know. You know why? Because it's classified. And because Daniel Graystone - beautiful, brilliant, morally BANKRUPT Daniel Graystone - is now too drunk or too depressed or too whatever to talk about it.

Vergis sure as hell doesn't give a damn - that was before his regime, and he's now too busy making toy soldiers.

I don't know about you folks, but a Graystone Industries truck colliding with a bunch of damn tanks...I got a feeling in my gut that this little PR embarrassment is just the beginning of something much, much bigger.

And something much, much more horrible.

External link[edit]

Preceded by:
The Vergis Agenda - Or At Least Part of It
Just Wondering About That Military Roadblock Thing Succeeded by:
STO won't last.

Monotheists: A Passing Fad, Nothing More is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in Ianuarius 12, YR42.


Someone recently set off a smoke bomb just outside of Goldie's Off Track Betting, and the public is blaming the monotheists.

The MAGLEV trains have been running fewer and farther between lately, and the public is pointing fingers at the monotheists.

A cat gets stuck in a tree, and the public yells the Monads scared it up there.

Be calm.

The recent monotheist resurgence is just that - a surge. And a surge is nothing more than a brief movement forward, the key word being brief. Just like a decade ago when the "Soldiers of the One," commonly called the STO, had their moment in the suns. But they faded into obscurity and so too will these monotheists. So when the Monad zealots knock on your doors on Sunday morning, be nice. When a proselyte at the spaceport stops you, smile and pass by calmly. You see, you know something they don't: Their time in the spotlight is but a fleeting one.

These are nothing more than a small sub culture of fundamentalists, most of them teenagers, rebelling against their upbringing because it's trendy. They believe in "One True God" because it's trendy. And, like most trends, it will pass in time. Are they really hurting anybody? Not really. They're more of an annoyance. Monotheists are harmless, barely worth a mention in our cultural consciousness. In fact, a year from now, no one will even remember what all the fuss was about.

You empower them with this paranoid nonsense, for the gods' sake. Take heed, friends. Take heed!


External links[edit]

Preceded by:
V-Clubs: A Reality, Virtual and Otherwise
Monotheists: A Passing Fad, Nothing More Succeeded by:
Will the C-Bucs Stop Here?
Frak this!

Parents: Get Your Heads Out of the Sand is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in Februarius 7, YR42.


Wow, it's been a great week, going through all of your hate mail and death threats and your pettiness. I love my job, and I love that I live on Caprica, where people can say whatever they want and write whatever they want, on the condition that any fool in a dirty shirt can poke it with a stick and tell me I'm actually wrong - and not only am I wrong, that I should frakkin' die for being wrong. Yes, I greet every morning with a smile as big as the charred, twisted gap in the MAGLEV line.

Yes, I said just a couple of weeks ago that monotheism was a passing fad, and nothing more. A fad that sure as hell doesn't breed any damn terrorists. And now you're all telling me that I was wrong, 'cause some monotheist terrorists blew up a train.

Here's the thing: I don't give a frak if they were monotheists or not. Rumor says 'twas was a bunch of kids that set off that explosion, high school students, and I believe it. And monotheists or not, when you put a bomb on a train and blow yourself and hundreds of people to the bright blue yonder, that's a sign of only one thing: Deep, deep mental and emotional distress, of frakkin' sociopathic proportions. And who/what's to be blamed for that in a kid?

The kid's parents.

That's right. Parents, I'm looking at you, again. Your kids blew up a train, and don't you dare blame the "One true God that will drive out the many," or whatever these STO clowns say. They're kids. They're your responsibility.


Because, apparently, everything's wrong with kids these days. Very, very wrong.

So stop wasting your lives in your stupid offices and gyms and power lunches and whatever the frak else you do and start being Mom and Dad, before something even bigger goes boom.

I await your hatred.

External links[edit]

Preceded by:
Graystone-Stark Memorial Scholarship Fund Established at Athena Academy
Parents: Get Your Heads Out of the Sand Succeeded by:
Monotheists Are Not Your Enemy
Just call them terrorists.

STO Training Camps: What Goes on There? is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in Martius 29, YR42.


Not that I give a frak about any of these frakkin' bastards, but I must admit, this has me a bit intrigued, if only because thinking about what must go on in these hellholes makes me all the more enraged.

I'm talking about what's referred to as STO "Training Camps," where they train boys and girls to be sicko terrorist scumbags. You know the STO - they blew up the MAGLEV train in the name of believing that there's only one god. Why such a belief requires the death of a bunch of commuters to get it across to us ignorant non-believing sheep is beyond me, but hey, I'm not a sicko terrorist scumbag.

I can only imagine what "training" involves for these idiots. Everyone probably wears black boots and green T-shirts. They probably eat some gross white gelatinous substance three meals a day. They probably have to build bombs in three minutes or less, or else they get shot in the head. They're probably forced run ten miles a day, and half of it is sprinting. And it's probably always raining there, so they get soaked, which makes them miserable all day long. They probably throw balls with spikes on them at each other instead of engaging in a good old fashioned game of pyramid. Then they all pray to their One True God before calling it a night.

Seriously, people, stop calling these jerks a "monotheistic cult." They don't believe in frakkin' anything except spreading fear and acting like idiots. They're terrorists. If you see any member of the STO, do Caprica a favor and knock 'em on the head. Hard. We'll see how well their "training" makes them handle that.




  1. Ralston Sinclair (Februarius 7, YR42). Parents: Get Your Heads Out of the Sand (backup available on Archive.org) (in English). The Caprican. Retrieved on 9 January 2011.
  2. military push ups - Google Search (backup available on Archive.org) . (24 June 2012). Retrieved on 24 June 2012.

External links[edit]

Preceded by:
The Telewindow: One For Every Home
STO Training Camps: What Goes on There? Succeeded by:
The Military Machine: The Other Side of Graystone Industries
Caprica's Evil Twin

Gemenon: The (Evil) Twin of Caprica is a The Caprican Opinion article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in Aprilis 24, YR42.


I was on Gemenon last week and it was so freaky and weird, I thought I was dead.

It really is the Backwards Twin of Caprica, folks. I might even go so far as to call it the Evil Twin, but I don't want to offend anyone.

Just kidding. Yeah, Gemenon is the Evil Twin of Caprica.

I was in Oranu, the capital, and every single building is a temple. The religious fervor in that place is insane. Actually, I take that back, not every building is a temple - every building looks like a temple. I wandered into what I thought was a temple because I was feeling nauseous and figured it might be better to vomit indoors than outdoors (yeah, I know that makes no sense, but neither does this entire Colony), and it wasn't a temple, it was the post office. I ended up not needing to throw up but I bought a postcard that I later used as an ashtray.

My next stop was in the other major city, Illumini, where I visited the Pantheon, which is roughly about the size of a hundred Pyramid stadiums. I stared at religious artwork for what seemed like five days. Every single deity in the Sacred Scolls is celebrated in one way or another in the Pantheon. And there are a lot of deities in the Sacred Scrolls. And I felt like I was being watched the entire time.

There's this foreboding sense of intolerance everywhere. It got to the point where I was wondering if I was even breathing right in the eyes of these people. It's all backwards. They renounce technology and yet every guy in a robe was talking on a cell phone - they have an excuse as to why it's OK at the ready, too, if you challenge them on it. And every kid is on drugs. They can't stand it there. How could they?

Speaking of kids, I took a jaunt out to Armonia, which was the real reason for my visit. I wanted to see the "secret base" of the Soldiers of the One. Well, I wanted to see if I could find it, the place where they brainwash the kids with nonsense and convince them to blow things up. No luck, couldn't find it - I guess that's why it's a "secret" base. I was pretty brazen about it, too, asking the locals where I could find the STO harbor. They looked at me like I had just killed their cat and then calmly told me they had no idea what I was talking about. Yeah, sure. I'm surprised no one snuck up behind me and shot me in the back of the head. But that would only have proven my point.

I felt like I was being followed all the way back to port. I didn't relax until I was safe in my apartment back in Caprica City, and even then I had a new security system installed the next morning.

Gemenon. Don't go.

External link[edit]

Preceded by:
Vergis Corporation Proposes New Energy Standards
Gemenon: The (Evil) Twin of Caprica Succeeded by:
Stop the Sagittaron Stereotypes

Pyramid Trade Requests Are High Treason! is a The Caprican Sports article written by Ralston Sinclair. It was printed in Februarius 16, YR42.


Traitors. That's what you are, and that's all there is to it. And I'm not going to name names, you know why? That would be too easy. You know who you are. And you should be ashamed of yourselves. You've betrayed your team, and you've betrayed the game.

I speak, of course, about the handful of Buccaneers that have requested they be traded to some other Pyramid team upon hearing the news that the late Zoe Graystone was involved in the recent MAGLEV bombing. Zoe Graystone being, of course, the daughter of Daniel Graystone, the owner of the Bucs (and their number-one frakkin' fan, I might add). Seems some Bucs don't want to be associated with a team that's owned by a guy who spawned a terrorist.

You fools. Really? Daniel Graystone, who's stood by you, who's believed in you and the game even though you go out there night after night and embarrass him with your losing streak, he who has stood by you through thick and thin, you're going to abandon him because of something his daughter did, that was out of his control? You ingrates. Daniel Graystone needs you now more than ever. Caprica needs you now more than ever. Let the mighty cities quake and explode, do you know what there will always be after the dust settles?


Now stop your whining and your self-righteous posturing and stand tall and be proud, damn proud, that you're a Buccaneer.

External links[edit]

Preceded by:
Mad Mothers Take Action Against Terrorism
Pyramid Trade Requests Are High Treason! Succeeded by:
Playing the Field: A Guide to Love in the Colonies

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