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IN THIS TEMPLE AS IN THE HEARTS OF THE APES |
Homeworld | |
This user is away | |
Name | Kevin Who? |
Gender | |
Date of birth | |
Age | 16 |
Location | {{{location}}} |
Timezone | {{{timezone}}} |
{{{email}}} | |
Gmail/GTalk | {{{gmail}}} |
AIM | {{{aim}}} |
ICQ | {{{icq}}} |
{{{twitter}}} | |
Callsign | Invader616 |
Parents | Mom and Dad |
Siblings | I am an only child |
Children | If I had some, that would be wrong |
Marital Status | It would be illegal to marry at my age |
Occupation | {{{occupation}}} |
Rank | Member Colonial Researcher/Historian |
Star of Kobol | |
Homeworld is a Chief | |
Homeworld is a Senior Chief | |
Homeworld supported the 2007 WGA strike. |
WELCOME TO THE HOMEWORLD[edit]
An Announcement From the Department of Random Public Announcements (Commercial Division)[edit]
THIS SPACE FOR RENT
...
YOU HAVE ARRIVED AT THE HOMEWORLD. YOU ARE NOW CLEARED FOR LANDING
Case Orange[edit]
"THIS IS AN OFFICIAL COLONIAL GOVERNMENT BROADCAST. ALL MINISTERS, OFFICIALS, ESKIMOS, REPUBLICANS, CLERGYMEN, ANARCHISTS, HIPPIES, QUAKERS AND OTHER RANDOM PEOPLE SHOULD GO TO CASE ORANGE, AND READ THIS BROADCASTED MESSAGE OR PUZZLE FOREVERMORE WHO THIS MYSTERIOUS 'HOMEWORLD' IS."
(ROSLIN: "It's an automated message made to be sent out to annoy people while they're trying to survive a holocaust. Don't even respond.")
BROADCASTED TO: Whoever cares to listen
ORIGIN OF SIGNAL: The Homeworld
Hello, fellow Battlestar Galacitca fans. I am Homeworld616. Allow me to drop some quick facts about myself to you.
- Real Location: Connecticut, United States of America
- Areas of Expertise: World History, American Literature, Christian Theology
- Stuff I'm Learning: Modern and American History, British Literature
- I Like: Battlestar Galacitca 2003, Code Lyoko, Dr. Who, Sim City 3000, Halo Trilogy, writing novels, science-fiction, food (all international cuisines), travel (internationa and domestic), high adventure, theme parks, and going on Wikipedia.
- I Don't Like: Americans who hate their country, Europeans who think the USA is more dangerous than Iran, populists, American politics, paparazzi, bad Hollywodd movies, bad American humor, self-congratulating journalists, and extremitsts of any creed, from Militant Atheist to Rabid Christian and all points in between.
- I am on Friendly/Business Terms With: Sauron18, Mercifull, Steelviper, Spencerian, April Arcus, The Merovingian, Shane and Talos.
Idols of Mine[edit]
Malcolm X[edit]
- The problem is still here
- Nationalism is the wave of the future
- We are brutalized because we are black people in America
- I for one will join in with anyone, I don't care what color you are, as long as you want to change this miserable condition that exists on this Earth
In case you're all wondering, I am white. But you know what? I admire Malcolm X anyway. He had amazing insight into the cogs and gears of prejudice and racism and he actually told the truth about the white race and their treatment of the blacks. To quote Inspector Finch from V for Vendetta, "The trouble is, he knows us better than we know ourselves." X's commentary on events and people have added a whole new dimension to my perception of the Civil Rights movement. In short, Malcolm X is the man.
George Orwell[edit]
- Who controls the past, controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past
- 2 + 2 =
- April 4, 1984 (ignore the first and last parts please)
- Here comes a candle to light you to bed. Here comes a chopper to chop off your head.
Okay, so YouTube has a rather poor selection of Nineteen Eighty-Four clips, but that is inconsequential. George Orwell wrote arguably the best and easily the most haunting bleak future novel, Nineteen Eighty-Four. His social commentary, brilliant mind, bleak settings and symbolism deserve him a place in the Annals of Literature. As a former socialist disgusted with Stalin's regime, Orwell has provided me (and many others) with a brilliant and subtely haunting social commentary. Just watch those images of Big Brother....<shudder>.
Stephen Colbert[edit]
- My all-time favorite. Stephen Colbert takes on WIKIPEDIA!
- Stephen Colbert takes on my state's politics
- Truthiness
- Cheerleading and Japanese Cars
- The Ten Commandments and Lynn Westmorelund
- Illegal Immigration
- Absolutely Maybe
- War on Terror
- Self-Engrandisement
- Stephen Colbert vs. Journalists
- Homeland Security
- Stephen Colbert takes on Veterans
- Stephen Colbert takes on the World Cup
Stephen Colbert is arguably the best social pundit out there, and easily the best comedian in America. You see, he pretends to be part of the Ann Coulter-like demagoguery, a Republican sheep, an Uber pro-American and a Super Christian, but when you watch The Colbert Report you realize the guile he uses. He actually protests most of the politics in Washington, DC through feigning support. His highly evolved sense of humor doesn't come easily for some, but if you understand it he's hilarious. Colbert's social commentary and enlightened sense of humor makes him an amazing human (who, coincidentally, is a Roman Catholic).
Editing Philosophy[edit]
Over the months I've been on Wikipedia and affilitated sites, I've developed a philosophy for editing that works well for me, and hopefully me fellow editors and SysOps. I attempt to put this into practice every time.
- I assume good faith.
- I condemn all personal attacks, and will remove them if they are too offensive.
- I have a Zero Tolerance Policy on Vandalism.
- I prefer to discuss large-scale changes (i.e. content additions) to articles on the talk page before changing anything.
- I respond to EVERY message I get on my talk page, although not necessarily right away. You can be safe knowing that ANYTHING you write will be answered at some point in time.
- I prefer communication and friendliness with other users.
- I am bold...with typo correction and small omissions.
Caveat[edit]
I'm going to come right out and tell you my blind spots, so that you can help me correct them and make me grow into a better user. Here are some problems I've encountered. I will also give credit to the various other users who identified these problems.
- I tend to be zealous with detail when I get excited about an article. An excellent example (to which April Arcus and The Merovingian can attest) is the Architecture section of the Arts and Lit article, which I then had to abridge massively and even then they still had to go in for clean up. (Problem identified by the two SysOps above)
- Certain wiki guidelines (i.e. the various naming conventions of Sharon Valerii). (Problem identified by Spencerian)
- Figuring out who's who here (SysOp vs. member). (Problem identified by Steelviper)
- I go nuts with trivia and notes. An excellent example would be the Notes section of Unnamed Cities of Caprica. (Problem identified by The Merovingian)
- BSG is filmed in Vancouver, and that city and its landmarks are featured in Colonial scenes. I try to base theories off of those screenshots, which is bad. (Problem identified by The Merovingian)
- I like to talk to people I'm friendly with here. To become wikifriends with me, you simply have to leave a note of any sort on my talk page. I will often contact you after that, and if I accidentally spam you or say something offensive, please correct me! (Hasn't happened yet, but just in case it does)
- I get the feeling that I'm not bold enough (see Editing Philosophy section above). Tell me where the line between being bold and being reckless is if I goof up. (Problem identified by myself)
- I can't figure out how to upload images. (Problme identified by myself)
Statement of My Mission on Battlestar Wiki[edit]
I am mainly interested in the Twelve Colonies of Kobol, their history, civilization, trivia, etc. On this wiki, I plan to contribute and edit articles relating to the colonies on a regular basis and perhaps create a few. I also know some trivia that I do not see listed here. I plan to fix that. I also want to be extremely helpful to my fellow editors and administrators and not be a time waster or a pain. Not to sound boastful, but I think it would be cool to be an admin one day. I can wait thought. I've a long life ahead of me and I don't think the quality of my contributions is that up tp par with those made by other admins. However, I am ready for a mop bucket when someone decides that I am up to the challenge.
Articles I Have Created/Edited for Battlestar Wiki[edit]
Sadly, most of what I write are stubs. This is due to the fact that I am interested in Colonial instutions/creations and the writers really don't go into those too much. The only true articles I've written are Unnamed Cities of Caprica and Cities of Caprica, one of which has been deleted. It should also be noted that any images you find in these articles weren't uploaded by me, but by other users.
More contribuitons will be coming, as soon as Season 3 and the new prequel Caprica comes out.
Directory of My Work[edit]
- Unnamed Cities of Caprica
- Cities of Caprica (Has since been deleted)
- Caprica 7 (Deleted on my recommendation)
- Caprica Beach
- Caprica 5
- Channel 7 News
- The News-Review
- Gemini Freight (Turned into a redirect for Gemini)
- Breeders Canyon
- Pergamus Flats
Statistics[edit]
In order to keep a track record of how I'm doing, I'm going to tally statistics of my articles that are kept and deleted.
Total Number of Articles Created
- 10
Number of Articles Deleted
- 2
Number of Articles Redirected
- 1
Number of Articles Safe and Sound
- 7
Articles I Have Edited[edit]
- Caprica City
- Delphi
- Twelve Colonies of Kobol
- New Caprica City
- Arts and Literature of the Twelve Colonies
- Toaster
- New Caprica
- New Caprica Police
- Fanu Sadin
- Adriatic
The Homeworld[edit]
CAUTION: THIS WILL BE RATHER SILLY
I suppose you are all wondering what this planet is, so I will tell you. The Homeworld is the fourteenth colony of Kobol that everyone forgot about. At least that is what we like to think. There was no fourteenth tribe of man, and our actual history was quite a bit less romantic. We were originally an out-system colony of Virgon, but moved to the jurisdiction of Sagittaron after a particularly embarrasing stint involving the leaders of both Colonies betting on a Pyramid game while strung out on green alcohol, and a semi-tamed mongoose whose involvement in the proceedings is questionable. We quickly became a source of cheap labor for a Colony that was adoringly referred to by the other Eleven worlds as "Our b**ch." The Sagittarians tried to make life good for us, and for Godsmas they built us a wonderful new professional Pyramid court and gave us our own minor league team. Unfortunately, on the opening day and premier game, the court, team and a promising group from the Society of Junior Executives Who Wear Three-Piece Suits and Golf on Sundays were vaporized by an almost, but not completely, unexpected volcanic eruption.
The Homeworld became industrialized and, lucky us, we got to do the jobs Sagittarians didn't want to do. Our colony became the proud home of several almost-but-not-quite-so-venerable worker's organizations, including the Royal Crap Movers Society, the Imperious Paper and Other Desktop Implement Pushers Union, the Order of Bueraucratic Red Tape and Fondue Stirrers, the Association of Gatherers and Collectors of Very Small Rocks, the Conglomeration of Estranged Custard Fillers and Franciscan Friars, the Amalgamated Alliamce of Nothing In Particular, and ENRON. A backwards economy and dictatorial rule ruined us, and the richer Colonies gave us aid money out of some sense of obligation or pity. We did what any third-world planet would do with over 700 million cubits: Blow it all on cockfights.
When the Cylons attacked and smoked the Twelve Colonies, they actually missed us. Didn't even come close, actually. Not by a long shot. We had some feeling that they knew about us though, since we received an encrypted message telling us that our planet was so pitiful not even Satan would go there, so they had no reason for wasting perfectly good nukes on us. Besides, they assumed we would go insane and gnaw our legs off partly from the highly toxic industiral fumes we had breathed in over the past few milennia, and partly from the Cylon's bad humor.
Nope, the Cylons didn't destroy us, but we were annihilated anyway. In a wholly unexplained cosmic event, a wormhole opened up and deposited a single Number 2 pencil into our orbit. It hit an orbital defense satellite, which happened to be carrying a large assortment of improperly programmed Daleks (we thought the Cylons weren't cool enough, so we made our own robots). The pencil, for some reason, released the Daleks who had been cyberhibernating. Robots don't like to be awoken from cyberhibernation, and did what any Asimovian robot would do: Blow up the nearest population of humans and then take a relaxing nap. The Daleks went on a rampage and we were all destroyed, making humanity very unhappy. Another equally unhappy person in some other area of the Multiverse was the high school student who lost his pencil to the vortex, and consequently could not finish his SAT and was then barred from the college he wanted to go to, depriving his planet of another professional pastry chef. Fortunately for humanity, another random worm hole opened up and sucked all the Daleks to the beginning of time. Unhappy about being deprived of their post-apocalyptic nap, they began shooting at the nearest cosmic beings, subsequently staring an intertemporal war whose result was a number of highly popular British television shows starring a Doctor who asked "Would you like a Jelly Baby?".
That's pretty much it. The Fleet accidentally stumbled upon The Homeworld during its exodus from the Prolmar Sector, but that was cut out due to time constraints. This history of The Homeworld is also being cut off, due to the fact that this page is silly and I am being watched by users who almost, but not quite, entirely disprove of silliness on a canon website. Have a nice day!
WARNING![edit]
Who do you think you are, Homeworld...whatever your true username is. You keep changing it every time we see you. Anywho, who do you think you are to go around cockily and make you userpage humorous? It's an outrage! A scandal!
Why is it such an outrage and a scandal?
Because this is a canonical wiki, and a serious one at that. Do you see them cracking jokes when watching BSG? No! It is a dark drama, and so should be our wiki!
But lack of humor makes people go insane. This place may depress users to the point of manic nature if no one steps up lighten the mood once in a while.
It is policy: Our silly pages should be rare!
I count seven or eight silly pages, and those are articles. This is a userpage, not an article.
But it is still a page, is it not?
Umm...I guess so.
Then you are caught in the wrong! Besides, we have other reasons to be displeased with you. For example, what is this "Homeworld" you speak of? It does not exist in the series. You claim to have seen it in a deleted scene. Cite your source!
What???
You heard me! Cite your source or face, the BANHAMMER!... ... ... ... The idea is to beg and scream for mercy right about now (hint hint)
But this is a silly page. Why should I cite a source on a silly page? The whole point of a silly page is to make up useless crap so people can laugh. Why cite useless crap?
Because we demand citations on even the most irrevent of articles!
Fine... here's your source. Source for my outrageous claim
What? You insolent cow! That is a clip from "V for Vendetta," a mantra against dictatorship and injustice. Are you trying to imply something?
No, honest! It was a joke!
You stubborn evildoer! I'm putting jokes on the blacklist. I never want to hear them again. Your humorous ways have finally driven me off the deep end! BANHAMMER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nooooooo! (cut off abruptly)
No actual users were harmed in the making of this satire on wiki politics. Any parallels with any other user's ideology or interests are unintended, and they should not be interpreted as being intended. I hold the utmost respect for policies here, and will always cite a source. I just like to poke fun every once in a while. If anyone takes offense to this, leave a note on my talk page where I will apologize and (GASP AND HORROR!) crack a joke.
Music to Work To[edit]
Most of these songs have videos attached. Don't feel obligated to watch them, as they are repetative. It's the song you want.
- 1: Nemo by Nightwish
- 2: Herr Mannelig by Haggered (This one's in Spanish)
- 3: Bless the Child by Nightwish
- 4: Crazy Frog Axel F (Beverly Hills Cop!)
- 5: Holiday by Green Day
- 6: Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day
- 7: Dragula by Rob Zombie
- 8: A World Without Danger (Code Lyoko Theme Song) by Noam
- 9: Bring Me to Life by Evanescence
- 10: My Immortal by Evanescence
- 11: Furious Angels, by Rob Doughan, Matrix Reloaded clip montage
- 12: Herr Mannelig by In Extremo (Here's the German version)
- 13: Tribute by Tenacious D (See Jack Black--Demon Slayer, spazzing)
- 14: Numb by Linkin Park
- 15: Theme Music from the SciFi Series EUReKA!
- 16: Tetris Theme Song
- 17: American Idiot by Green Day (with a bonus!)
- 18: Jesus of Suburbia by Green Day. Welcome to Jingletown, USA
If You See What I See, If You Feel As I Feel...[edit]
SPECIAL THANKS TO THE MEROVINGIAN, FOR INSPIRING THIS SECTION WITH HIS OWN LITTLE "V" SECTION
Alas in the midst of all my humor, there is always room for seriousness. In fact, the links below will lead you to the true side of our planet, a side of darkness and oppression. The following is the rise of dictators, and the beginnings of revolutions. Dictatorship and oppression is what happens when millions of people stop thinking and succumb to fear and terror. BE WARNED.
"You gotta stand up for something, or you'll fall for anything".
- Remember, remember the 11th of September...
- V for Venezuela
- "So this is how democracy dies...with thundrous applause"
- "He offered you order, he offered you peace. And all he demanded in return was your silent obedient consent"
- This is over the top and this country's problems aren't this bad...yet, but nevertheless has some good points regardless
- "Fear became the ultimate tool of this Government"
- "Cruelty and Injustice. Intolerance and Oppression"
- Ideas are bulletproof...the Revolution begins
A Government can burn the National Archives and all the documents in it, but they cannont burn away the rights in those papers. Rights are something man has from birth and are embedded in his heart and nothing can kill that. Revolution should never be taken lightly. The current American political situation is fodder for rabblerousers, but not enough to justify bloody rebellion. Revolution is a bloody, drawn out process where many more die than need be. But when the liberties and freedoms that are your birthright are revoked, you have every right to revolt.
Next Projects[edit]
- I would like to make a directory of Colonial corporations and possibly add it to the Twelve Colonies series under the label "Economy." However, I'd like to hold off on that until the next season comes, as well as the new prequel, Caprica, where some more companies may be revealed.
- When the prequel Caprica is released, I will watch it with my laptop close at hand. As they come up, I will mercilessly write articles about any company/city with a proper noun in the name. I can take care of the urban and corporate portions of the prequel, while other users can write about the various new characters, technologies, etc.
- I really need to do something on the Think Tank. It seems that only admins do stuff there and the normal users hardly contribute. I mean, for the love of heaven there are over 1,000 users here and 7 admins. If only 7 out of 1,000 contribute, that is a badly lopsided figure. Don't worry Think Tank, I am coming to contribute to thee! DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA HOME-WORLD!