Canceron Wants a Fourth Pyramid Team

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Canceron Wants a Fourth Pyramid Team is a The Caprican Sports article written by Matthew Riley. It was printed in Aprilis 19, YR42.


Before I get into this madness, I just want to share a quick story about Canceron. I was there last year for a couple of days, and I wasn't in Psammos at the casino, I was in Hades, trying to get in touch with the people and keep it real. A seven-year-old kid kicked me in the crotch and his buddy punched me in the face and they stole my wallet after hitting me on the head with a log.

That's it. Yeah, Hades is as poor and frakked up as you've heard.

Now, on to Pyramid. Canceron, as you know, has three teams. Canceron calls itself "The Largest Democracy," because they're so frakkin' overpopulated. Apparently they can justify having three Pyramid teams because there's just so many people on the Colony. Whatever, I don't make the rules or sign the paperwork.

OK, so you've got the Canceron Hydras (who play in Hades, where, as I think I mentioned earlier, two seven-year-olds hit me on the head with a log), the Hades Vice, and the Mangala Krill. Three Pyramid teams. And because all these poor people keep having babies, Canceron is getting even more overpopulated, which means they want yet another Pyramid team for a grand total of four.

They're out of their minds, of course. What's the point? What could the League hope to gain from a fourth Canceron team? Hey, who knows? They've filled out the paperwork (yet again) and have made the bid. Maybe this year they'll actually get it.

They haven't gotten as far as deciding what the fourth team would be called, though. What do you think, Pyramid fans? The Psammos Claws? The New Hades Silver Crabs? The Hades Seven-Year-Old Thugs?

Gods damn those kids. I liked that wallet, too.

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Preceded by:
The Capricanization of Tomas Vergis
Canceron Wants a Fourth Pyramid Team Succeeded by:
Graystone Computers Recycling Program